“How Being a Good Girl can be Bad for Girls” by Toman and Higgins.
Alice in Wonderland and “Atlanta”
QUOTES:
“The cultural anxiety precipitated by unbounded female sexuality is perhaps most apparent with regard to adolescent girls. Coming under scrutiny from across the political spectrum, girls’ sexuality has been deemed threatening either to girls themselves (potentially resulting in rape, sexually transmitted diseases, unwanted pregnancy), or to society (as evidenced by the single mother, school dropout, welfare dependent). Although none of these issues is limited to teenage girls, all frequently arise in that context because of society’s sense of entitlement, or indeed, obligation, to regulate teen sexuality” (Tolman).
Tolman argues that adolescent females do not fit into the “good” girl category. Teenage girls are more in touch with their own sexuality that they do not restrict how they feel and for many, how it effects the male. This behavior is threatening because for a girl to be aware of your sexuality and to not be afraid to reveal it is seen as bad. The “bad” girl appears and girls are seen as “wanting” it. The double standard applies here because “boys will be boys’ but when a girl is seen a provocative it opens up society’s views of them as being promiscuous and a tease. AS usually, the burden always seems to fall on the women; it wasn’t rape because you teased him and wanted it, you are pregnant because you chose to have sex.
This reminds me of Grinner’s “Hip-Hop Sees No Color” when she discusses SCWAMP through the film Save The Last Dance. “Her body represents sex, as in one scene where she “steals” Derrick from Sara on the dance floor and begins dancing in a sexually explicit and provocative way in contrast to Sara’s innocent movement” (Grinner). Although this fits into the “Good girl, bad girl” category also, I want to emphasize Nikke’s body language . This may certainly be seen as “threatening” behavior that Tolman discusses in his text. If she were to be raped that night the prosecutor would most likely bring up her dancing as sexual behavior.
“Perhaps more than any other group of men, teenage boys are assumed to be least in control of their sexuality. The responsibility for making sexual choices, therefore, falls to their partners, usually teenage girls, yet these “Choices” are to be enacted through passivity rather than agency. Girls who attain good girlhood are at constant risk of becoming bad girls if they fail in their obligation to regulate their own sexual behavior and that of their partners”(Tolman).
Here Tolman discusses the fact that boys cannot control their sexual urges, thus making it the girls responsibility to say yes or no. However, the choices the girls make usually tend to let the boy have control, as opposed to the girl being in control to say yes.. if she wants to. Although saying yes and succumbing to their sexual desires puts them into the bad girl category. It is a no win for the girl. Tolman goes on to discuss the fact that many teenage girls use their sexuality to please the male.
This is unfortunate but true. Women and girls, from the beginning of time have always wanted to please their man, as opposed to a man pleasing a woman. This is not just for sex, but when it comes to taking care of others. It has always been the job of the women.
“Teenage girls interviewed in the Sentinel story explained their peers’ behavior in terms of girls giving boys what the boys wanted. One suggested that “sometimes girls, in order to get certain guys, will do anything the guy wants. And that includes sex” (Tolman).
This statement suggests that girls want a boy more than they value their own sense of self and body. Girls are also much more aware of what their sexuality portrays and what their sexuality arouses from their partner or men (boys) in general. Many use their sexuality it as a tool as opposed as pleasure for themselves.
Perhaps here I can connect “Atalanta” and “Alice in Wonderland.” Both Atalanta and Alice go against this behavior. Although neither one of them have the sexual qualities that Tolman brings up on his text, both females seem to fit into the “good girl “ category as they refrain from “getting their man” by arousing them with their sexuality. Most importantly Alice and Atalanta do not fit into the ideology that a woman needs a man and the male is of dominance. They are confident and that stereotype is exactly what they are not. They go out to experience the world or at the very least, they respect and act upon their own needs and desires. If Alice were portrayed as more sexual I am sure she would have acted on her desires without hesitation or the thought of what people may think.
When thinking about Christianson’s “Myths that Bind Us” I was reminded of the “Secret education” he discussed. It is interesting that Alice in Wonderland is a Disney film unlike most of the other films Disney films like Cinderella, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, and The Little Mermaid all have female heroines who focus on who they will marry as it is the most important thing in their life. In the end, they get their man and live happily ever after. They do not need anything else. They represent to the viewers (mostly young kids) that a female’s worth is the man at the end. However, Alice is portrayed as a educated, dominant female who puts any desire for a man aside to fulfill her own destiny. The vidoe has many of Disney's female leads waiting and wanting thier man.
Something to think about: Don't we all want soemone to love in the end?
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